One of my ferrets, Buster, died unexpectedly a week before my birthday.

The day after my birthday, I was told I was losing my job in Ma ydue to financial hardship.

Then I got sick with a nasty sinus infection.

Then the Virginia Tech stuff happened.

Now the warm weather is here and my spine is UNHAPPY.

Thus, the new blog digs. It's my attempt at some black humor; a reminder of sorts that it always seems worse than it might be. Again it's a recycled design I used several years ago and one of my favorites.

It has been a rough month. I've not felt much like sitting down and writing in the last few weeks. Blogger is getting on my nerves. However, checking in with you all probably won't kill me and as long as you keep your expectations realistic, you might not be disappointed.


Buster Brown
I've been trying to find a photo of Buster but, of course, the CD with images of all the critters is MIA because I need it. Buster is missed. The ferret condo is in my kitchen and he used to pop out of his sack when I made dinner at night or breakfast on the weekends to watch me. He would lay with his chin on his paws and watch me cook. If I came close to the cage, he'd sit up and wait for a scratch on the snoot.

Anyone familiar with ferrets know they all have their weird little quirks (just like humans) that make them who they are. Buster loved to dig and would routinely aggravate me by digging at the fresh litter when I cleaned their box, creating a huge mess in the cage and wasting litter. He enjoyed sleeping next to the litter boxes too. The litter box had to be not only hooked but wired to the cage because he hated anything up against walls anywhere, including people sized furniture. He was seen trying to push the couch away from the wall and was caught trying to figure out how to move the refridgerator too. Buster had a rubber fetish. I have photos of him trying to steal the plunger from the bathroom. He would steal hair brushes with rubber handles, rubber bands, cell phones if they were encased in protective holders that had any bit of rubber in them.

Buster died unexpectedly. His cagemate, Tavvi was the one we all expected to go first. She has adrenal cancer and sleeps a lot. She has always been a bit bitchy and aside from attempting to escape her cage or the house, she was largely unconcerned with humans unless the food bowl or water bottle was empty. Buster was active, robust and showed no signs of illness or age, as he was 7. Up until a few weeks ago, Tavvi seemed undisturbed by Buster's absence. But as of late, Tavvi has been coming out of her sack and looking for some attention. She has begun to seem a bit lost when I take her out to play and Buster is not there to run her over or drag her around by the neck. Ordinarily, I might consider getting her a new roommate but Tavvi has never liked anyone but Buster. She will bite the cats and make ferret ass kicking noises if they get too close to her. We will just have to see.

The Job
I've not been around here as much due to having to job hunt. I've not actually hunted for a job for at least 12 years, and have only been in this paid position for a couple of years. The rest of the time I was having sine surgeries and recovering from them. There were years where my "job" was going to doctor, physical therapy appointments, pain management, and re-learning how to walk, rebuilding endurance, etc, etc, ad-nauseum.

I've been lucky to have all kinds of great support, a terrific caring DRS counselor and other vocational rehab professionals but job hunting still sucks. I've never liked it and like it even less now. It's all such a big stupid, superficial game. The job I'd like to have can't pay me at the moment so I'm hunting. The critters need litter and I need to pay my bills. I have another interview at the beginning of next week that looks like a good fit. Wish me luck.

Pain Season Begins
It's the beginning of warm, humid weather here in Virginia and since there's been virtually no Spring my back is hurting and making my life miserable. There are times when people don't get that when you cope with pain 24/7, you have very little energy or motivation to do much of anything but get through the day. I push myself a lot because it's important to me that I not allow pain and depression to govern my life but it takes a lot more energy than people realize and even after all these years, I get frustrated and tired.

The gallery has it's first anniversary this weekend and a good show, so I'm looking forward to having some fun.

Thanks for all the lovely messages and good vibes sent my way. I'm certain their energy has been helping to keep me afloat. I really appreciate them, although I might not be able to respond to them all.

More soon.